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How Far Along: 32 weeks. Umm….holy cow!
Size of Baby: Baby weighs in around 4 pounds or so, and is about 19 inches long.
Gender: Girl – sugar and spice, probably a lot of spice!
Weight Gain: 18 pounds. 7 more pounds till I hit my “target” weight. 8 weeks of pregnancy left…I can do it!
Symptoms: Some hip pain, but I’ve been seeing a chiropractor, so on the whole my usual pregnancy-pain complaints are really few and far between.
Exercise: Slowed down a little this week due to life-craziness, mostly walking with the kids. I think I’m going to hang up my running hat and stick with walking until this baby comes. My last run/walk left me feeling pretty gross and tired for two days, so I’m thinking walking is in order, and perfectly okay.
Clothes: All maternity.
Cravings/Aversions: Ice cream. And fruit. I am eating peaches and blueberries like I’ll never eat them again.
Movement: Still pretty consistent. Getting into bigger movements, like rolls or pushing various appendages out.
Worries: Baby was head down at my last appointment, so I’m not worried about that. But, I am starting to stress about not knowing anyone to watch my other kids while I have this baby. Sure, we have some people who could drive and take care of the kids, but that’s looking at an hour and a half. So, we need to at least find someone who will watch them for a few hours until someone else can come…
Milestones: Baby is almost at her birth length, and is continuing to gain weight and work on practice breathing and swallowing. Also, less than two months left until we have a baby!
Best Moment This Week: We are finally starting on some preparations for this baby. We ordered a crib, mattress, and dresser (for Nathan’s clothes in the closet), and the crib has come! Its not put together, its sitting right in our entry area, but we have it.
How Far Along: 23 weeks
Size of Baby: Baby is the size of a papaya and weighs over a pound!
Gender: Completely confirmed girl!
Weight Gain: Just under 10 pounds.
Symptoms: I feel pretty good in general, but over the weekend had some pain/discomfort I think we Braxton-Hicks. I think they were caused by a lot of walking with no sitting in the hot sun, so they should be reasonably avoidable. Since this past week has been VBS at church, I’ve had some back and hip pain, just from doing a lot of standing.
Exercise: Last week I got in two runs, plus a bunch of walking at the zoo. With VBS this week, I haven’t been able to get in any run. Lot and lots of running around, but no actual working-out type running.
Clothes: All maternity.
Cravings/Aversions: I really, really want some coconut-rolled dates. Our local co-op sells them, but I haven’t wanted them enough to drag the kids out on yet another errand this week. Also craving fruit; so glad its summer!
Movement: Getting more and more frequent, with a few movements I could feel from the outside!
Worries: Feeling good these last two weeks.
Milestones: Baby is beginning to fill-out a little, adding fat deposits. This also means her skin is becoming less translucent.
Best Moment This Week: We had a great family weekend at my cousin’s wedding. We went swimming twice, went to the zoo, ate my mom’s famous birthday cake, and just generally had a good time, all together.
I am seriously falling behind here. I know these aren’t super exciting posts and I’m tempted to give them up, but I really do enjoy looking back on them and comparing my pregnancies.
How Far Along: 20 weeks
Size of Baby: Baby is the size of a mango – about 6 or 7 inches long and weighing in at about 10 ounces.
Gender: Pretty much confirmed that this baby is a girl. Should be “officially” confirmed at my anatomy scan on Monday.
Weight Gain: 7.5 pounds. This is about two pounds under where I was with Nathan, and since I started this pregnancy about 5 pounds heavier, I’m reasonably pleased with that, I guess.
Symptoms: Nothing really comes to mind (besides ordinary tiredness and drinking crazy amounts of water).
Exercise: Doing better with this! We went for a 2+ mile walk yesterday; it took us forever (C walked some, stopped to watch people fishing, bathroom stop, etc.) but I’m encouraged to try to get more exercise in more frequently.
Clothes: All maternity. The medium clothes that I was so sure I would need soon are still a little big – I still wear them, but man is it nice to put something on and think “this looks a little baggy.”
Cravings/Aversions: Onion rings. We live sort of near a Hardees, and that is ALL I can think about every time we drive by. Yuuuuuuum. Strangely, cooked carrots are on my hate list. I adored them last pregnancy, and while they don’t taste bad, I don’t like them at all this time around.
Movement: Gaining frequency, but I can still go quite awhile without feeling anything.
Worries: That this baby will magically turn into a boy; I’ve been looking at girl clothes and man oh man, how fun! I would still be very, very happy to have a boy, but I’m kind of locked into the girl-thing now, and that would be a big adjustment. General worry about having three kids – I read some things about having two under two, and one of them put a lot of emphasis on keeping your older child safe while you care for baby. Umm, I have a hard enough time keeping Nathan from flinging himself off the sofa or falling off of something as it is. What am I going to do with another baby in the mix!?
Milestones: Halfway to meeting this baby! Also, if baby is a girl, her uterus is currently fully formed and her ovaries contain eggs!
Best Moment This Week: I was a training ultrasound for a local crisis pregnancy center, where I friend of mine works. I got to see this baby, which is always fun, but we also got to look for identifiers for gender. Although they can’t tell you gender there (they aren’t allowed to do anything diagnostic), my friend said, “I can’t officially tell you what it is, but I don’t see any boy parts.”
How Far Along: 18 weeks
Size of Baby: About the size of a bell pepper.
Gender: I referred to the baby as “she” the other day, so I’m still stuck on girl.
Weight Gain: No idea – I was at my parents’ and didn’t weigh.
Symptoms: One or two headaches this past week, but they haven’t been bad. Heartburn has started, and I haven’t been a fan of that so much.
Exercise: I’m trying to get in more purposeful exercise lately, which has mostly just been small walks pushing the double stroller. Its not running, but its something.
Clothes: Maternity! Including my very first maternity swim suit.
Cravings/Aversions: Ice cream! I really want sweets and I don’t like Chick-fil-a meals, but do love their milkshakes.
Movement: Seems to be more and more frequent and getting stronger!
Worries: I found a tick on my back one night, and then had a day with a terrible headaches and exhaustion and worried I had a tick-born illness (proof I am ridiculous).
Milestones: Finally starting to feel like I have some amount of energy!
Best Moment This Week: Spending time with my boys enjoying a little “vacation” time with my parents. Also, I didn’t have to cook!
How Far Along: 14 weeks
Size of Baby: About the size of a lemon.
Gender: My gut is girl.
Weight Gain: About one or two pounds. Woot! I’m not sure how long I’ll keep track of this, since I started out at a heavier weight than typical for me, and the thought of gaining 30 pounds (typical for me during pregnancy) is stressing me out. But, I did loose at least a pound earlier, which has never happened to me during pregnancy, and have probably gained about two since then, for a net gain of one.
Symptoms: More nausea than in my previous pregnancies, but still not bad. Serious fatigue, but that seems to be getting a little better now that I’ve hit the second trimester. I had a ton of dizziness at this point with Nathan, and I have that this time around, but it hasn’t been as bad (I had several times where the edge of my vision would go black in my last pregnancy, but this time has been much milder).
Exercise: I’ve tried to keep up with running, but since the Color Run two weeks ago, I haven’t done any. I’m struggling to find the time between taking C to school, N’s naps, and home showings. Plus the whole energy thing, but I’m hopeful I can get back on top of it this week.
Clothes: All maternity pants; my regular pants do still fit, but they get more and more uncomfortable as the day goes one, and especially after eating, so I just gave up. A few non-maternity shirts still work, but maternity tops give better coverage and the ones that aren’t gathered at the sides are baggier and I feel like hide things more if I want.
Cravings/Aversions: In general, nothing really grosses me out, but not a lot appeals to me either. Mostly all that sounds appetizing to me are things like ice cream or milkshakes, although in the last couple of days I’ve really wanted a plain bagel and cream cheese.
Movement: I think I’ve felt some, starting at about 12 weeks. It can been several days or weeks between thinking I can feel movement, but when I’ve felt something it has been when I’m sitting still, which doesn’t happen too often.
Worries: Like last time, lots of things worry me. I had some bleeding early on, which my doctor things was probably latent implantation bleeding. But that freaked me out a good bit. Also, I have a friend who was close to a month behind me, had a good 8-week ultrasound and found out a week later she had miscarried. So of course, that makes me nervous (and feel totally awful for her). Most of my other worries center around having three kids four and under, and just being worried about poor Nathan – stuck in the middle with a sibling 16 months younger than him and a high needs older sibling.
Milestones: Second trimester!
Best Moment This Week: This didn’t happen this week, but when we told Colton we were having another baby, he assumed it would be a boy. After my 12 week ultrasound I told him the baby *might* be a girl. He was immediately happy with his and declared, “we need to go to the mall to get Scout Baby a hair bow! Some stores have hair bows at the check-out.”
I have a lot of thoughts swirling around in my head about our recent loss.
Most of the time, I think I just feel plain sad and upset about the situation and missing the things I “should” be doing. Today I saw a cute “Big Bro” shirt on sale at a local store. It had long-sleeves and would have been perfect for Colton to wear, if we were still having a November baby. I thought about buying it, but then I felt like there was no point – Colton probably won’t need long-sleeves by the time we have a new baby.
But then, I remembered I parked in the “Stork Parking” spot at a local grocery store. I had to run in to buy yogurt, and all the spots near either entrance were full. Then I saw the Stork spot, open. I thought, “hey, I’m pregnant, not very pregnant and not visibly pregnant, but I’m pregnant. It counts.” So I parked there. And I remembered it today, and I was happy I did something in that short pregnancy that was “normal,” something I’d be doing at a later point in pregnancy.
I bought a pair of maternity pants this week. I was browsing Ann Taylor Loft’s maternity section, not because I’m a glutton for punishment, but because I have a coupon from them and will get a $20 gift card from them for my birthday next month. I don’t want to use them to buy regular clothes that won’t fit me when I’m pregnant again, so I thought I’d use them to get some good maternity staples. So, I was browsing to see what options they had. And then I found a pair of $70 corduroy pants, in my favorite cut, on sale for $14, with an additional 40% off. Now, normally clearance clothes are size 000 or something that almost no one can wear. These, were in my size. When my husband came home, I told him I just HAD to buy them. Bless him, he just said, “you need to do this don’t you? Do it if it will make you feel better.” So I bought them, and they are en-route to me now. It may seem strange, but to me buying those pants is like me saying, “I believe I will be pregnant again, and I will be pregnant long enough to need maternity pants.” Those pants represent my hope.
And then, sometimes, I feel like my pregnancy was a waste of time. I hate that I feel that way, but I do. If I hadn’t gotten pregnant at the end of February, I could have gotten pregnant at the end of March, or get pregnant at the end of this month. Maybe I wouldn’t have had a miscarriage then. And I’d be closer to actually having a newborn than I am now. And then I feel terrible and awful and think what I really want is to be pregnant now.
People have told me, and I’ve read, that most miscarriages that happen before 8 weeks occur due to a severe chromosomal abnormality that would have prevented the baby from developing properly. Isn’t a healthy baby better than one that will die shortly after birth or be severely handicapped and have a poor quality of life? Logically, maybe. And I can handle people telling me that now, and I can sort of see their point, but in the middle of all this, I wanted that baby, and I would have taken whatever having that baby meant.
I actually found a great online resource today, pregnancyloss.com. I’ve been doing a lot of looking for something like this for a while now, and I’m so glad to have stumbled upon it. Seriously, good information about what to expect following a miscarriage has been hard to find.
I was pregnant. Until I wasn’t.
Today, I should be going for my very first ultrasound, seeing our baby for the first time, and excitedly telling people about my pregnancy. Instead, I’m looking forward to my bloodwork on Friday and finding out if my hormone levels have returned to normal.
It’s been over a week since I found out for sure we lost the baby, two weeks today that I suspected that might be happening. The past two weeks have been so very hard, scary when I didn’t know what exactly was happening or what to expect, then just hard in so many ways. But my husband really stepped up to the plate and took care of Colton for an entire week while I laid in bed. Friends brought us meals, and two great ladies sent me a “box of love” with various special things for me to enjoy. Colton is also the greatest toddler ever, and I am so very, very thankful he’s around.
I’m expecting today to be hard. And other days like my estimated due date and Christmas, when we’ll have one child when we would have had two. But, I am also confident that things will get better. Eventually, I’ll be pregnant again and eventually we’ll have another child.
But waiting is hard, until then.
Hubby and I took six labor and delivery classes; each one lasting 2 and a half hours. Even so, there was a lot I was not prepared for in the labor and postpartum recovery process. I know some people don’t really want to know what’s going to happen, but I am not that person. I want to know as much as humanly possible so I can be mentally prepared.
That said, this post is meant to both be reflective of my experience and hopefully prepare some other people for what may come (you know I wouldn’t forget you Erin!), and hopefully have a little humor in it as well!
And now, what no one told me, but probably should have.
1. You know how your body changed drastically, but it happened over 9 months? Yeah, expect the reverse to happen in about 9 minutes (not literally). And the hormonal changes? Soooo fun. Night sweats, weepiness, etc. are all part of the normal recovery. Personally, I feel emotional now than I did when I was pregnant.
2. Labor is a hot, sweaty business. It was frigid in our room, and I was still burning up the whole time I was pushing.
3. Speaking of pushing, it hurts. It is so not like pushing out poo, or anything else you’ve experienced, though people will tell you it is. Basically, you will push until you feel like your bottom is going to rip into millions of pieces, and then you will keep pushing. Personally, I felt like I couldn’t breathe and might throw up, and just had to push through it.
4. Once you’ve had the baby, you will still be in pain. You may not be able to sit down. You may not be able to pee sitting down because it hurts, so. stinking. bad.
5. If you tear or have an episiotomy, get a script for the strong drugs. Yes, even if you don’t take them in the hospital. Even if you think you’re resting a lot, you are doing more than you did in the hospital, and you will be in more pain. You’ll thank me later.
6. Everyone worries about pooping or screaming or doing something else embarrassing during labor. Don’t bother. When it happens, you will not care. In fact, you probably won’t notice you’re screaming. You definitely won’t noticed if you poop — there’s too much going on and too much pain down there to notice.
7. I heard a lot about how horrible the first post-birth poop is. Maybe it was the stool softeners, maybe it was just me, but the the first was not bad at all; it just kind of came out. It’s the second and third ones, the ones you have to start working for, that are bad.
8. You will need a squirt bottle to clean off after you “eliminate.” Seriously, no use of the TP except to pat dry.
9. If you want to walk while you’re in the hospital after your water has broken, they’ll give you mesh panties and a giant adult diaper. You get to wear this same get-up after you give birth until you go home as well. Even though it doesn’t sound attractive or fun, you may possibly grow attached to them and want to take them home with you. You know, just in case you don’t think you’re ready for big girl panties yet. Or maybe that was just me.
10. Before discharge, you’ll get a few basic instructions about pain medicine, cleaning, and what not to do, but nothing about what’s normal and what’s not as far as bleeding and such goes. You’ll be home, wondering if what’s happening to you is normal or not. Chances are, it will happen on a weekend, when you can’t call your doctor. Good thing though, is that more often or not, you’re totally normal.
Oh, and as a bonus, probably half of what you think you want to do during and after labor or while in the hospital won’t happen. Life never goes according to plan, so things change based on what’s happening. For example, I sent Colton back to the nursery pretty much right after I was finally sewn up. He was born at 2:30 am, and after about an hour of fixing up, I was exhausted and couldn’t even fathom the idea of holding him for more than 10 minutes without falling asleep. Don’t worry, after a little nap I had Hubby bring him back to the room. I never would have imagined I would kick out my kid in favor of sleep, but oh boy was it exactly what I needed.
This post is linked to Top Ten Tuesday. Go check out Amanda’s blog for more fun lists, and her new “Wilder” series – totally awesome!
Interestingly enough, according to my doctor, I’m already 40 weeks pregnant. His chart has me 6 days ahead of where I have thought, for nearly 40 weeks, I was.
I am probably the only person on the face of the planet who thinks their due date is a week later than it really is, and is actually a little upset to find out that it’s earlier.
So this week’s doctor’s appointment was full of fun! I didn’t get checked, and since I’m not having any contractions (that I can feel), it doesn’t seem like I’m in labor in any way, shape or form.
So we got to talk about induction!
We also talked about sweeping my membranes at our next appointment if things don’t seem to have changed.
I’m more okay with the second option than the first, but I need to research it more to be sure I’m really more comfortable with that than an induction.
I’m still hopeful, especially based on my last visit, that I’ll go on my own in the next week. Before my appointment. Or, actually the day of my appointment. Because how fun would that be!?
I’ve been trying to walk and do other things that are supposed to get labor going, no luck yet.I can feel a lot of pressure from his head, especially when walking, so I think that’s good. I’m also having a lot of rear pressure, which is not so much fun. Let’s stop that.
Other than that though, I feel really, really good. Now that I can sleep in and rest during the day I feel a lot better and a lot less tired. I feel like I am waking up slightly more frequently than I was, but I am almost always able to fall back asleep easily, which is really nice and makes the middle of the night wake-ups not so bad.
We got our curtains yesterday, and once we get them up the room will be finished! I can’t wait to share photos. The room just makes me happy; I love to sit in there and just admire mine and Hubby’s hard work and imagine what having a baby in there will be like.
While I was in the bathroom, leaving my “sample” at my last doctor’s appointment, I heard a commotion in the halls; something about a delivery and hoping he made it. Turns out, my doctor had to run, literally, to deliver a baby. It’s a good thing their offices are in the hospital!
Because he was gone, I had to see one of the other two doctors in the practice. On the one hand, I was excited because there’s a chance one of the other doctors will deliver my baby, and I’d like to see him before he shows up and I’m pushing a baby out. On the other hand, I was not excited to have to see a new doctor on a day I was scheduled for an internal.
No need to worry though – the doc was FABULOUS. He came in and plopped himself down on the stool like he was in a recliner. He put us at ease, and even went over a few things with us our regular doc hasn’t. He felt the baby and said right now he thinks he’s between 6 1/2 and 6 3/4 pounds, and that he’ll be between 7 and 7 1/2 pounds at delivery. Not a bad size I hope!
And the dreaded internal? Not nearly as bad as last time! I was almost dreading it this time, though I really, really wanted to know if I’d made any progress. So, not only was the exam not half bad, neither were the results! I’ve progressed pretty significantly in the past two weeks, and am now 2 to 2 1/2 cm dilated and 50% effaced. Yes! Go uterus! The best part is that I feel pretty normal, haven’t had any Braxton-Hicks or really anything that atypical from anything else that’s gone on this pregnancy. I’m hoping this means I’ll labor like my mom, who didn’t know she was in labor until her water broke. If she passed nothing else on to me genetically, please Lord, let it have been that.
The doc said I may not make it two weeks sans baby, which is really, really freaky. I knew I was getting close, but this is crazy. In less than two weeks we could have a BABY? I mean, I know we’re having a baby, but an actual outside-of-me, sleeping in the bassinet in our room baby? It just seems so hard to believe. In fact, during the internal he said, “I have my fingers on this baby’s head.” I thought “HOLY COW! There really is a baby in there!” Even with the ultra-sounds and feeling movements and everything, it just doesn’t seem quite real. Having someone say they can feel the baby makes it feel real in a way it hasn’t been before.